an odd epiphany
written: 8:51 p.m. on Wednesday, Aug. 13, 2003

how long are we going to be here?

From now to eternity.

But if we died tomorrow, does that not mean that eternity is only one day?

If we died the very next second, is eternity a mere split second?

I realised today while sitting opposite The New Kid at McDonalds' and laughing at three primary kids at the table next to ours that eternity is actually relative. This epiphany strangely occured when one of the kids asked her friends, "How long are we going to be here?"

The New Kid laughed. He laughed non-stop at their conversation and didn't bother to pretend that he wasn't eavesdropping.

I smiled, and mumbled out loud, "From now till eternity."

That's how long we're going to be here. Perhaps I meant it in another way then, for sometimes he really affects me in ways that I thought were long buried with that previous relationship. And sometimes when I think back to all the stupid things I've done, I literally feel sick.

But that's not the point I'm trying to make here.

Eternity is relative. There is no such thing as 'forever' because humans don't live forever; we can't.

'Eternity' is therefore best defined as the moment the word escapes from our mouths in the form of a promise to the day that we die.

So if a guy promises to love you for eternity, you know that it's a lie, because firstly, it doesn't exist, and secondly, if he dies earlier than you, his eternity is shorter than yours, and therefore he'd be too dead to love you for the whole of your eternity. If you die earlier than him, it's also a lie, because there's no way he can love you and let you know it if you're dead and buried six feet under and feeding the worms and the bacteria flooding your casket.

Damn. I just can't do something serious without being cynical about it in the end.

Although I did mean what I say, every single word.

before sunrise // before sunset


Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010