an erratic entry.
written: 9:30 p.m. on Friday, Dec. 24, 2004

Even if the answer is no, I'm gonna do it anyway.

First. I officially hate the idea of the pseudo prom. Went to Raffles City today in hopes of scoring a nice dress, but did that happen? NOOOOO. Why? Because I am me, and because people can't design for nuts. Seriously, the stuff I saw were either cheap and ugly or gorgeous and expensive. I even saw a great one that costs 800-something. Can you believe it? I can't.

Like, fuck off and die. Or something.

I'm currently very irritated. I was trying to wrap up some gifts for my little cousins; they're having a birthday/Christmas "party" thingy tomorrow. I usually like wrapping stuff as it's fun, but not today. There're two separate gifts and I attempted to wrap them together, but the shape was all weird and stuff and the final result was completely grotesque; hence, I ripped the stuck-together magazine paper out. And I used magazine paper because I am out of wrapping paper.

I hate the so-called festive season. Go to hell and never come back. The worst songs in the world are Christmas songs; they're even more ear-bleed-inducing than Chinese New Year songs, and those are already bad enough. How many times in a day must I hear the same song played over and over and over? And I find it extremely stupid that people are only doing "charitable" deeds during Christmas. Does it mean that the less fortunate ones aren't suffering for the remainder of the 364 days of the year?

But whatever. And why are non-Christians celebrating Christmas anyway? In my dad's words: ~{6<2;PE=L~}.

Exactly, Dad. The ONLY good thing about Christmas is the log cake; period. I don't even like receiving gifts as it means that I'd have to give something back to the person, and I don't even have enough money to spend on myself, let alone others, so it's a real pain in the ass.

What's the big deal anyway? The only festive season that I truly love is the Chinese New Year period, but of course you feel shit-all during the period in Singapore because you only get two days off. In Taiwan, they get all 15 days off. They have firecrackers. What do we have in Singapore? Two-day Chinese New Year (how utterly not in line with tradition!) and endless blasting of shitty CNY songs, some even in muzak. Gag me with a kitchen knife, please.

Okay, I think my animosity towards Christmas has a lot to do with my anti-imperialist sentiments, as well as my Chinese chauvinist inclinations, but whatever. I can't be bothered to write too much about it now.

So, back to the futile dress-shopping.

Wait, then again, I think I'm done writing about that.

I saw a hilarious bumper sticker on a car parked in the URA parking lot. It said: "No! No! No! No! CaSINo!"

I thought it was the funniest thing I've seen the whole day.

My stand on the 'to build or not to build' casino debate is this: Do whatever you want. Just don't regret it.

But I am very amused by those who're against it on pretentious moral grounds. They say that it's immoral, that it's addictive, that it'll have negative social effects. Well, we don't see anyone protesting against horse racing and 4D, do we? And aren't those forms of gambling equally addictive? Haven't we heard enough stories about how stupid people are so sucked into their pathetic hopes of striking the first prize that they squandered all their life savings on four stupid numbers? So why aren't anyone taking up arms against that?

Hello? Talk about being extremely hypocritical. And if I supported the casino shit, it'd be entirely due to economic reasons.

But since I can't be the least bit bothered, I still say this: Do whatever you want.

Though I do wish that the fundamentalists would just shut up.

Back to the stupid pseudo prom. I don't wanna go anymore. And I can't believe I'm going. And I can't believe I bought the ticket mainly because of the fact that someone else would be there. It's really dumb, because I don't care anymore if that person's gonna be there or not, since I don't exactly have a crush on him anymore.

Ugh I'm so damn pissed off. If I don't find anything at Orchard on Monday, THAT'S BLEEDING IT. I'm wearing my Sec 4 dress. I don't care anymore. I'm planning to split the farce after I've been sufficiently amused there anyway.

Oh, and at Robinson, I saw a nice pair of shoes, so I asked the salesman for a size 7 or 8 to try on. When he came with a size 7 (the largest size), I started to put my right foot into the right shoe, until I mused out loud to my mom, "Is this real leather?"

And the salesman said, "Yes, it's real leather."

Upon hearing that, I quickly retracted my foot as if it'd just been scalded. I handed him back the shoe and said, "Okay, I don't wanna try anymore."

It was a very nice pair of shoes and for a split second, I was caught between succumbing to my desire and sticking to my beliefs. I chose the latter instead.

Yeah, come on and laugh at me, but after 4 years, I still kind of espouse animal rights. I feel sorry for all the poor turkeys that have been slaughtered because of Christmas, and I definitely feel sorry for all the animals that are murdered in millions every day to be cooked and placed on dining tables the whole developed world over as meals. I even feel sorry for the fish that my mom makes me eat every day; I've never liked the taste of fish anyway. It's gross.

I support Peta. I think they're doing beautiful work. And I really don't care that designer fur coats are ruined by red paint that they splash during fashion shows; people who wear real fur and continue to buy fur should shoot themselves in the heads anyway.

And leather? It smells disgusting. I don't understand how people can like it. I'd rather wear faux leather, thank you very much. At least it doesn't stink as much, you know?

Hmm. Maybe one day I'd go vegan.

Wait. I can't live without cakes, and I can't live without coffee with lots of milk. I think full-vegetarian is enough lah.

When I was in Taiwan, many relatives kept asking me why I don't eat most meat.

What could I possibly say? Adults don't get it. They only think of the nutritional value of food.

Well, good for you, but I choose to focus on the ethical side. I'm not under any pretentious delusions that I'm a completely ethical person, since I still eat fish and the occasional prawn (I hate eating unshelled prawns though; the way the eyes bulge at you is totally distressing), but eliminating chicken, beef, pork, etc from my diet was quite a huge thing for me to do. I used to love chicken and beef and I still think they taste good...okay, maybe not beef; the taste kinda makes me wanna hurl now. But chicken tastes damn freaking good, especially fried chicken. And I loved Peking roasted duck too.

But seriously, how can anyone eat with a decapitated duck head lying dead on a plate? Doesn't ANYTHING prick at the conscience? Whenever I dine with the extended family and I see things like that, I'd be on the verge of losing my appetite.

And I hate eating a fish cooked whole as well, and it's the issue with the eyes again. It's just scary. And it totally reminds you that it used to be a living, breathing creature.

Oh, and one last thing: the dumbest argument for eating meat is that "God created animals for us to eat".

Another reason to be anti-religion.

I don't think I was born for these times. And I don't know why I just went off about animal rights and the like; I really wanted to say that I felt quite bad about dumping the shoes back to the salesman without even trying them on.

But who asked the shoe manufacturer to use real leather? It's absolutely abhorrent and I refuse to participate in this mass orgy for dead animal parts.

Okay, time to watch TV. It's some American Idol Christmas thingy. I just want to watch and listen to Fantasia sing; I still think she's amazing.

And I completed the Slam Dunk yaoi fic I talked about yesterday. Cause for celebration, but it's extremely rough around the edges and it needs heavy editing.

Nevermind though. The important thing is, it's finished.

Finally.

I love MitRuMit; even better, RuMitRu. Bwahahahaha.

before sunrise // before sunset

Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010