a pointless entry, like all entries.
written: 9:40 p.m. on Thursday, Jan. 13, 2005

I'm so bored with myself and bored with having shit-all to do and bored online that I could die. And just so we're certain, I have nothing to write about; hence, this entry is a waste of time and space.

But I have plenty of time to waste so why not?

I think I'd rather go to school. That is, without the obligation of taking exams. But that would be pretty pointless wouldn't it?

I don't feel like writing but I want to write. Does that make sense?

God, this is so frustrating. I thought it would be the diao-est (diao: Taiwanese slang for 'cool', as endorsed by Jielun) thing on earth to not have anything to do, but I'm actually really fed up with this perpetual boredom that plagues my days. It sucks, to be honest. I don't feel like doing anything, and hence it should follow that I don't know what I want to do, which is the truth.

Wait, there is something I wanna do: eat Swensen's banana crumble or whatever it's called. It's lovely, and expensive too, but are we surprised? Didn't think so either.

Oh, before I forget, if my layout isn't working, let me know. It looks fine on my laptop, but when I change the encoding to Chinese simplified, the link headers go all screwy on me. I'm thinking of changing the alignment of the links and all to centre but...I'm too lazy to change the damn thing one by fucking one. Argh. Fuck.

The worst thing in the world is not having anything to do. But I can't decide if taking the A Levels was better...no, it wasn't. It was the worst experience of my life and I don't wanna think about it.

I finally finished that RuMit fanfic I started one or two weeks back; stayed up till 2.30 a.m. this morning writing it. But you know what? The ending is the shittiest ending to ever come into conception in the entire history of the world. I'm not kidding. I think it was the sleepiness that made me write such disgusting, overly-saccaharine (and saccharine is already bad enough)...mush. How ironic, when taking into consideration the crucial fact that I hate mush and that I am the most cynical person alive.

I guess that's the effect MitsuixRukawa has on me. Bwahaha. I think I'd do a nice MitRu someday, but it's gonna be pretty tough since I don't really see Mitsui as the "oh I have the hots for Rukawa but I don't really know what to do about it" type; he's more like the "oh everyone has the hots for me but no one's good enough for me" type. I mean, just look at him. He's so amazingly hot, and that confidence/arrogance (line's pretty thin; sometimes non-existent) just drips from the things that he says, and it's even reflected in his appearance. Besides, I've always liked my RuMit/MitRu to be somewhat angsty, and I like giving Rukawa a hard time. It's fun, you know. And I think the tortured-admirer-from-a-distance type, so hopelessly in love with the all-desirable and sexy and hot and gorgeous Mitsui Hisashi that he'd do anything to be with him, is so Rukawa-esque. He's always been a class-A weirdo anyway.

Okay, I'm sure no one has any idea what I'm talking about, but suffice to say that...ah fuck it, it's not important.

Life is extremely boring. I can't stand this. And Meg Ryan better not cop out on me; I really wanna watch The Aviator. And I haven't seen him since the pseudo-prom so what the hell.

Random thought: my British GP tutor once commented cynically in class that the true mark of an educated person is his ability to use the semi-colon correctly.

Haha! I don't know how serious he was when he said this other thing, but he also said that there's a possibility that I'd surpass him in the future. Which is really amazing, since I personally think he's a mini-genius. Honestly. That old dude is so well-read and knowledgeable that many teachers in good ol' Jurong Junior just completely pale in comparison to him. I kinda miss his sarcastic cynicism, his weary bitterness, and that gorgeous British accent...oh well.

Another random thought: this other GP teacher whom I hold in pretty high regard(s) also once told me that if I were of his age, I'd surpass him intellectually.

Bwahahaha. But seriously, that was like, "...wow", especially since it came from him. I do admire some of my teachers, you know. Not everyone in Jurong Junior deserve to die (just kidding). And I'm keeping in touch with Tubby (Lit Paper 4 teacher) via email, and I swear, that man's the funniest person ever lived. I berated him for not attending the pseudo-prom, hence making me miss a photo opportunity with him, and he was like, "Why would you want a fat man among your visual memories of JJ?"

Hahaha! I really dug his self-deprecating humour and sarcastic wit. What a smart ass. I hope he's making better use of his time in that Woodlands junior college; Jurong Junior didn't deserve him. Too bad he takes like ten million years to reply to emails though.

You know what I really want right now?

I don't know either.

I haven't been following the NBA; I haven't been doing any reviews; I haven't been writing any pseudo-poetry; I haven't been actively looking for a job; I haven't...etc etc.

Damn. I feel like I'm just wasting my time. It sucks. It really fucking sucks. Just when I finally have so much free time, I begin to wish I had something to do.

Life's a paradox anyway; there's no reason why its myriad subsets should deviate from that.

Time to play with Photoshop. Might as well make full use of the 30-day trial.

Need money.

before sunrise // before sunset


Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010