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in the dead of the night. One. But Metersbonwe, fuck. Zhou Jielun, dammit. And Shanghai would be a ticket that lets me escape from this country, even if it's only for a while. I can't envision being stuck here forever; it's akin to being strapped into a straitjacket and left in an asylum under lock and key for the rest of your pathetic, meaningless and pseudo-life. Two. Three. My answer: I don't know. But one thing is for sure: That 'other side' bloody well exists and I'm going to find it one day. Four. But then again, on second thoughts, why bother to euphemise when you can simply state the truth, the blunt truth and nothing but the truth? Why should I not criticise other people's abysmal and appalling taste in pseudo-music when I have as much of a right to tell them off for their ignorance as they have to continue indulging in it? Why should I regret that I am Me, The Almighty Genius, when the alternatives that I see around me aren't even worth my brain cells to consider? Five. I am also empty. Directionless. My days are so idle that it makes me sick. I have lost that precious epiphany which injects meaning into life a long time ago. I shouldn't see life as a vast meaningless Blank at the young, tender age of Eighteen, but I'm sorry (even though I'm not), I can't help myself. Everything points to that, doesn't it? The only answer to the essential question that life poses to every one of us is Death, and that's it. Six. For the sake of my sanity, do not even get me started. Seven. Where do I fit in? Do I even belong in the most remote sense of the word? I don't know. It's so little but that's all I can give right now. Eight. Nine. Funny how I'm not even trying to write anymore. I'm really an abhorrent human being. Ten. Speaking of anime: The right pronounciation is ah-ni-mei, not eh-ni-mei. Just like manga: mahngah as opposed to man-gah. A manga-ka is a man hua jia is a manga artist. Isn't that amazing? I think it is. I've kind of figured something out as well, the whole Jin/Mugen thing. I like Mugen because he's the bad boy that females typically delude themselves into thinking they could tame; and I like Jin because he's the enigmatic, beautifully broken man that females typically yearn to heal by breaking him down. And I can't decide who I like better because the two of them represent the types of men that I've never been with; hence, both are intriguing as hell. If I had to choose that gunpoint though, I'd probably choose Jin. It's the paleness of the skin; you can't possibly get any sexier and hotter than that. Owari.
before sunrise // before sunset
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