transience and mortality.
written: 8:34 p.m. on Thursday, Aug. 04, 2005

I logged on to jay-chou.net to look for lyrics to a song, and I went to the Singapore thread and found out that someone died.

And she wasn't just some random online person; I've met her before. It was this huge jc-net gathering thingy at KBox and we went to watch Initial D after that at Plaza Singapura. She was doing the crazy fast Jielun raps, like Ren Zhe and Wo De Di Pan, damn funky stuff that nobody else could do, and now I'm just in a state of shock.

Save for my grandfather, nobody I know has ever died. I didn't know her well, I spoke about two actual sentences to her during the KBox day, I read her online posts and found them funny but that was about it, but all the same, I feel so disturbed right now, it's so unreal, people who die used to be mere names in tiny newspaper print, not actual people with whom I've had real-life contact who are (were?) just two years younger than me.

It's so sad, so weird, so unlike most things I've experienced. Life is a piece of shit but what could've been so terrible that she had no way out but death?

I'm still reeling from shock.

I don't know what to say anymore.

before sunrise // before sunset

Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010