nonsensical, insignificant late-night/early-morning entry. (or: don't bother with this crap.)
written: 12:59 a.m. on Tuesday, Sept. 13, 2005

I found out that the composer Julian Barnes wrote about in "The Silence" is Jean Sibelius, a Finnish composer who wrote a piece called The Dance of Death, if memory dating back to 1999 Music Elective Programme classes serves (it probably doesn't).

I know that he wrote something titled along the lines of The Carnival or the Animal Carnival or something like that.

Anyway, I thought the composer in the story was German. As a result, while I was at the Esplanade library on Sunday, I was looking up modern German composers and came up with Arnold Schoenenberg (I can't spell) and Richard Strauss, both of whom didn't fit the bill. But how was I to know that the composer in question was Finnish? When I first read the blurb I thought it was Beethoven, until I read the story and they mentioned jazz and Igor Stravinsky and Wagner and Mahler. Yeah, there you go.

I am up right now because I am working on something which is due very fucking soon.

Or rather, I was trying to work on that something until I randomly connected to some wireless network and it presto, it worked, hence this entry.

If it's not obvious enough I don't really have anything even remotely substantial to say.

Not looking forward to Contract tutorial on Wednesday. I tried reading the textbook - laptop and Anson's Law of Contract on my bed, the air-conditioned switched on at 5 in the afternoon, and before I knew I was falling alseep.

I have lousy studying methods.

Mostly because they're pretty much non-existent.

I love writing. I really do. More than anything else in the world, more than I can adequately describe, more than one can possibly imagine or hope to understand.

Stop procrastinating!

**

2.40 a.m. and I am still up and not sleepy and super bored. Hence, I decided to do a survey, just to entertain myself - yes, this entry has just got even more redundant. Wahoo.

Got this from Kenn.

Name: Yelen.

Birthday: July 14, 1986

Birthplace: Singapore.

Current Location: Bedroom.

Eye Color: Brown.

Hair Color: Dark brown. I want jet black hair.

Height: 165 cm.

Right Handed or Left Handed: Right

Your Heritage: Chinese. I've been told a lot that I look Eurasian/mixed-blood though, something that strikes me as rather odd because I don't have a single drop of foreign (ie. non-Chinese) blood in me. Hmm. Maybe my looks simply don't conform with the stereotypical Chinese look? People say I don't look Singaporean either (however a Singaporean is supposed to look because nationality isn't exactly a very physical thing) and I can't be more glad.

The Shoes You Wore Today: Yesterday, I wore my cheap greenish slippers from DMK. It's giving me disgusting bruises on my feet. Yuck.

Your Weakness: Jay Chou, Veronica Mars, Julian Barnes. Oh wait, that's more than one 'weakness'. Um, ha ha.

Your Fears: House lizards. Shit I just heard one in my room. I can't sleep tonight!!! Help!

Your Perfect Pizza: Cheese and nothing else, and lots of tomato sauce. Yum.

Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Survive law school unscathed. I don't even want to think about getting A's anymore; trying not to burn out is already an onerous task in itself.

Your Most Overused Phrase On an IM: "Haha". Same applies for SMS.

Thoughts First Waking Up: Shit don't want to go to school.

Your Best Physical Feature: My eyes and my legs. I genuinely like my legs...that is, the portions below the knees. I have gargantuan thighs and elephantine (elephant in adjective form; I am like soooo clever) hips. Mini-mini skirts don't look good on me, which is why I only wear mini-skirts.

Your Bedtime: That sounds too juvenile for me to answer seriously.

Your Most Missed Memory: Probably the times spent in Jurong Junior with my friends, namely Mel and Pei, and sometimes Khai. I miss the stupid and dirty and fugly study benches and how we hung out there every recess and some lunches and bitched about funny Science stream people and talked and laughed like it was the only thing worth living for. It was amazing and treasured only when it's taken away from you. It's sad.

Pepsi or Coke: Yuck I fucking hate soft drinks. Milk tea and iced coffee. I don't take coffee un-iced.

MacDonalds or Burger King: The latter, if forced to choose at gunpoint.

Single or Group Dates: Single. Who goes out on group dates? That's just hilarious.

Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton fucking sucks ass and I mean it. I drink...what do I drink? I don't remember the brand, but yes, I don't drink Lipton. It's McDonalds' tea. It sucks. And what the hell is Nestea? Wait, I don't want to know.

Chocolate or Vanilla: Both.

Cappuccino or Coffee: Uh...what's the difference? I like mocha.

Do you Smoke: No.

Do you Swear: This question is so stupid that I won't even dignify it with a proper response.

Do you Sing: Uh, sometimes.

Have you Been in Love: Mildly. I want to fall in love with a hot stranger who speaks neither English nor Mandarin and make love in his dingy apartment all day long. Sweep me off my feet and rescue me from the boredom that is my life, wake me up, invigorate me! (No, I don't read trashy romance novels and I never will.)

Do you want to go to College: I'm in uni. It was never a real question, always a given. Duh.

Do you want to get Married: NO. Loud and emphatic: NO. Fuck no.

Do you believe in yourself: I think, yes, ultimately. I think I believe in nothing else but my own strength (I can't help ripping off Samurai Champloo 'cause it kicks ass); the problem is, I am inherently negative and pessimistic, which means that most of the time I'm too blinded by my own faults to remember what I'm good at.

Do you get Motion Sickness: All the time. Can't SMS/read/laptop/rummage around bag for stuff in the car and especially not the bus. MRT is fine though.

Do you think you are Attractive: It depends on when you're asking. People say I am and sometimes I wish they'd stop saying that 'cause there are seriously times in which I think I'm the fugliest person ever lived. Conversely, there are also times in which I think I'm hot stuff. But, mostly, I think I need to lose weight. Honestly. My figure is grotesque. I even have fats on my face. How sick is that? (Off topic: I just suffered a mild cramp in my neck. Major joy and happiness.)

Are you a Health Freak: Hahahahahaha hell no. The only exercise I do is shopping.

Do you get along with your Parents: Mostly, yes.

Do you like Thunderstorms: Yes, love them. Awesome. Rain and cloudy weather make me happy; thunderstorms make me ecstatic.

Do you play an Instrument: I used to play the piano. Now I've forgotten whatever little I learnt about it. I also dabbled in the art of guitar-playing for about two months. Um, I remember the C chord. Wahoo.

In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Yes, at Mel's party. It made me quite giddy. I am straight-edged and non-apologetic about it.

In the past month have you Smoked: I don't smoke.

In the past month have you been on Drugs: Uh, straight-edged people, like, don't do, like, drugs, do they, like?

In the past month have you gone on a Date: Uh...let me think. Past month...probably, yes.

In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No. I don't eat Oreos. Oreos are only good in ice-blended drinks and McFlurry's.

In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Yep, Sushi Tei, which is good. Sakae Sushi is fucking shit; only dumb asses eat at Sakae (haha don't kill me for saying this; I know many people who eat at Sakae). Edo was a million times better.

In the past month have you been on Stage: Nope.

In the past month have you been Dumped: Indirectly, kinda. Well, no, it wasn't really, so, no.

In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No.

Ever been called a Tease: No. Nobody speaks like that, seriously.

Ever been Beaten up: Uh. No. I am mild-mannered and nice to everyone.

Ever Shoplifted: No. I've never gone down the wrong path before, the crap I did in 2002 with the first boyfriend notwithstanding. How interesting.

How do you want to Die: Pretty.< What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Apparently, a lawyer. Actually, I still don't know.

What country would you most like to Visit: Most? China. I'd say "Taipei" but 1) it's not a country (and not merely because I'm referring to a state in Taiwan); and 2) I've been there so many times that I've lost count. But I can't wait to go back to Taipei next June. Would be smashing.

In a Boy/Girl...

Favourite Eye Color: For non-Asians, green. Absolutely gorgeous. For Asians...pretty obvious ain't it? And NO I do not like Chinese guys who wear coloured contacts, especially blue contacts. It's Just Weird.

Favourite Hair Color: Natural. I hate guys with bleached hair. It's vile and stupid and they should get a life and stop being such retarded ang moh poseurs. No matter how hot a guy is (i.e. Edison Chen), the moment he bleaches his hair he is fugly. Even Edison Chen, whom I regard as the Ideal in terms of physical attributes, looked shitty with bleached hair; what makes you think you, a mere mortal (and a male at that) will look good with bleached hair? The answer is, YOU DON'T, so knock it off.

Short or Long Hair: Whatever looks good.

Height: Um, taller than me. I dated a guy shorter than me. That was the first and last time.

Weight: Uh, I like skinny guys.

Best Clothing Style: Whatever.

Number of Drugs I have taken: Why is it that you assume that we've all taken drugs before? I AM STRAIGHT-EDGED THANK YOU.

Number of CDs I own: Over a hundred.

Number of Piercings: I don't have any but I adore guys with pierced ears 'cause that's, like, the hottest thing ever.

Number of Tattoos: Uh, not too big on tattoos, don't really care, I don't have any. I am straight-edged and clean-cut. (Read: Fucking boring. Oh wait, I can't be clean-cut if I swear, can I?)

Number of things in my Past I Regret: None. Regret is negative energy, worse than hate, more useless than pain, infinitely more retarded than sadness. Regret, in fact, gives rise to sadness and pain and hate. If you eliminate the cause you will cease to feel the effect. Eliminate the cause. Don't regret. And I will try not to. (ButsometimesIdokindofregretthelawschoolthing.)

before sunrise // before sunset


Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010