the oasis.
written: 8:50 p.m. on Tuesday, Jan. 17, 2006
My fourth practice test. It marks the first time my Math score hit the 600-something to 700 range. I have one more critical reading section and one more writing section to go but from the looks of it, the test also marks the first time my CR and Writing scores fall below the 700-something to 800 range. This is extremely worrying. I'm taking the test next Saturday, my abominable LAWR assignment is due next Saturday, it's the eve of Chinese New Year next Saturday, oh everything sucks. And because I applied to you-know-where and because 99% of its applicants have SAT scores that hover around 2300 (out of freaking 2400) it means I have to get at least a 700 for all three sections. And I've only written one essay to date. And that essay sucked ass. This is really bad.
2. School
School exists. It goes on. That is all.
3. Not Writing
I haven't had anything to say as of late. I'm also not particulary enamoured to the thought of people reading this anymore. I'm not completely adversed to the idea and it's only a select group of people whom I mind reading this, but the zest I had for updating this thingy religiously in the past has deteriorated over the past 7 days (I know it's 7 days not because my Maths is good but because Diaryland says so), and the rainy season seems to be over for good and the weather is always my perfect scapegoat.
Blame everything on the weather. I'm pretty sure it was the insanely humid weather that caused me to screw up my stupid O Levels, too. (Afternoon classes, fourth floor classroom, sometimes after PE, the class in question was usually Physics. Need I say more?)
4. Hilarity
My bro and I were watching MTV Pop Inc for a while after dinner. I love retarded people who mispell words on purpose; they make me laugh so hard. I would give examples but I can't remember most of what I read, except the generic "anyone wan to noe me" and the astonishingly creative "hieeeeee lolz tis song rox likkez kewl!".
I'm sure this is already a well-known fact, but just in case anyone missed it the first 4729475 times I mentioned it: I'm an anal about spelling and keeping the language pure. I don't mind the occasional slang (Singlish not included) but it pisses me off like hell and makes my blood boil to see people coming up with the most preposterous re-spelling of words. Get a life, yall. Its lyk so nt kewl. wateva. eu haf no eyedear hao stoopit u saond.
5. Et cetera
I have to present Question 1 of Seminar 2 for Criminal Law on Friday, in front of about 80 people. I am not looking forward to it.
I tell myself to be tolerant of other people's opinions, even if I find them utterly stupid, but god, the things some people say in class can truly make a person wish that it were legal to exterminate them. Since I'm anti-death penalty, that basically mean, gather such people together and banish them to like, Antartica or something. Intention to murder versus actual death, and there were people saying, "Oh it doesn't matter whether the guy actually intended to kill; the only thing that matters is that he killed someone." So I suppose we should all put to death drunk drivers who claimed lives on the road, architects that approved badly-constructed building plans that end up killing people when the buildings collapse, war-time presidents that approved plans to wage wars, sex partners that cause the other person to go into cardiac arrest and eventually die in the middle of an orgasm...hello? And I so wanted to laugh when I heard the phrase "sanctity of life", because obviously they weren't listening to what they were saying. If they were such staunch supporters of that notion they wouldn't be so quick to mete out the death penalty to people who accidentally caused the death of another person.
I still wonder why the hell Section 300(c) even exists, if judges can ignore it, and if it's (I think) against public policy. I wasn't paying full attention to today's class and so I wasn't sure if MH had already addressed that question and so I sat there with that question running through my head and didn't say a word.
Criminal Law is the least sleep-inducing module thus far but it's disturbing all the same (and not just because of the above rant). The way they describe how the victim died: so technical, clinical and cold. You usually come across such descriptions ("The deceased had 9 broken ribs", "the knife pierced through the deceased's jaws at an angle enough to kill him", "The deceased had several bruises along her vaginal wall") in novels written from the perspective of a serial killer. The facts of the cases, too; sometimes you feel sorry for the killer (I refuse to use the word 'murderer' where there's no clear intent) when he was motivated by dire economic circumstances, other times you feel disgust for the rapist who was "overcome with desire" when the 58-year-old woman's pants fell off in the midst of a struggle (I say, go to a bloody brothel for chrissakes), mostly you question your own beliefs and convictions, what makes you say that such people are still human beings, what justifies your probably-naive belief that humans are essentially good. Are people just fucking stupid when they slash a person's leg 7 times to "keep him from escaping" (during a robbery of the victim's car), do they not know their own strength when they have their hands around a 14-year-old girl's neck, or is there something darker behind these actions? I don't want to just condemn, but when I see things from the other side it becomes a little bit harder.
Personally, I think (for you can never be sure until it happens and of course you don't ever want it to happen) if someone killed a person I loved I wouldn't feel any better knowing that the killer is about to die/is dead. Revenge is not my schtick. I think that the biggest punishment is that which the person inflicts upon himself. It's in the mind, the guilt that tears you up knowing what you did; and even if you don't feel guilty at all, karma is a bitch and it will come back to bite you hard in the ass.
Well, anyway, we all die in the end so I suppose some things don't matter as much as we think they do.
That includes Life.
Really, folks. It's quite overrated. But that's just me.
6. Conclusion
It's now 9.38 and I took close to an hour to write this and maybe that's why I don't write anymore. It takes too damn long and the result is mediocre at best and so I say, What a waste of time.
before sunrise // before sunset
Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010