My father is a terracotta warrior.
written: 10:46 p.m. on Wednesday, Jul. 08, 2009

Even if you are the paternal figure.

Actually? Especially if you are the paternal figure.

The thing about him and me is that we're both equally stubborn and equally convicted in our viewpoints. I have also become more argumentative after four years of law school, and have also begun to automatically analyse everything a person tells me in my head to see if what he's saying (ranting about) actually flows in a cohesive, coherent line of argument.

Whatever my dad said to me last night? Utter epic fail. Therefore, I cannot be bothered. I cannot be fucking bothered talking to unreasonable, unintelligible people who act as if they have no brain when in fact they do, who treat me as if I'm some retard with a below-average IQ, with no regard to my intelligence, and worse still, my feelings. The latter I can still kind of swallow, but the former? I hate it when people condescend to me and undermine my intelligence (because I am of the humble opinion that I'm probably smarter than you; therefore, it takes A LOT for me to respect someone. Especially a guy), talk to me as if I was born yesterday, conveniently forgetting the fact that I went to law school and therefore am more than capable of picking apart your fucking useless arguments and showing you, in an entirely cavalier fashion, how much I do not - DO NOT - care for the nonsense you're sprouting at me.

And please - don't pull the passive aggressive crap on me. Because I can do it twice as good as you.

I am so fucking sick of this nonsense. And this time, the objectively-understandable "your dad is just looking out for you" defence fails utterly on all counts, and it ceases even to be a mitigating factor. It's become a case of strict liability, section 300(c) murder, and I feel no sympathy whatsoever to his case, to his claim.

And if he honestly thinks I'd even conceive of the idea of choosing between A and B, he's seriously - SERIOUSLY - mistaken. The fact that he can even conceive of saying such a thing, the fact that there even exists a logical space in his mind in which such a possibility festered...it says a lot about his irrationality, his utter unreasonableness. And I just can't be bothered to deal with such retarded, useless rubbish. Would anyone want to waste time talking to an unmovable brick wall? Only if you're retarded. And my dad knows I'm not, so I'm sure he'd understand.

***

I was so pissed on the train this morning that I almost wanted to go over and yell at this utterly useless excuse for a human being when I witnessed this atrocity. I was standing in the first carriage, and at one of the stops this old man boarded the train. He was REALLY old, like 70-ish, and he looked around, trying to spot an empty seat, but there were none.

This was despite the fact that the corner seats were all clearly labeled "reserved seating" or whatever with illustrations of who qualified to take those seats right above the said seats. Woman with child, the elderly, the disabled, and I forgot the last one.

There was this particular piece of shit wearing a Singapore Polytechnic t-shirt, some fug-ass visor, and fug-ass flip-flops sitting on the reserved seat. He was playing with his fucking retarded PSP and had his earphones plugged in. BUT he clearly saw the old man - and I know this because I was staring at him, and he looked up and looked straight at the old man.

But guess what this utterly useful piece of shit taking up extra space in this already-too-small country did?

He did nothing.

What a fucking bastard. I cannot emphasise enough how much it fucking pisses me off to see perfectly able-bodied and young people sitting on the reserved seats - especially during rush hour. I never take those seats, even if the train is relatively empty (I picked this up in Taipei). And even if I do, for sure I'd give up my seat when I see an old man STANDING IN FRONT OF ME.

That fucker. I swear, I was so tempted to go over to him and say, "Excuse me, do you have a broken leg? Are you a woman with child? Are you 70 years old? Why the fuck are you sitting here?" Looking back, I think I should have. I was in the perfect bad mood for it, but...shit, I didn't.

I cannot say enough how much I HATE, absolutely HATE, people like that. Utterly selfish. And sad to say, people like that define the Singapore society - utterly uncivilised, severely lacking in social graces, utterly selfish and brutish and uncouth. Going to Taipei and coming back here, sometimes I don't even want to come back to this fucking lousy country and deal with its useless citizens because the contrast between Taipei and Singapore is so, so stark, it really makes me wonder why our stupid society is the way it is. Why are we not more considerate, why are we not more gracious, why are we not less selfish? No one pushes to board the train in Taipei, not even during rush hour. The train in Taipei is always SO quiet, and no retard would ever blast his retarded music on some misguided pretext that people actually give a shit (we don't). And for sure - FOR SURE - you will NEVER find some young punk still gluing his ass on a priority seat when there's someone obviously in need on it, and usually the priority seats are unoccupied because people just don't take them. And people always stand on the right side of the escalator WITHOUT FAIL. I tend to forget this when I go back on the first day and always get scolded by the people behind me, trying to walk down the escalator.

This country is so...once when I was going home and getting off at Jurong East, this couple blocked the whole damn entrance with their stupid baby stroller. I mean, great for you that you have a kid, but oh my god, they just stood there with the stroller blocking the door and letting people walk around them. How fucking inconsiderate. I made sure I glared at them as I got off the train.

Seriously, taking the MRT only serves to remind me of all the reasons I cannot stand this country. I cannot stand the selfish and inconsiderate assholes, cannot stand the pretentious idiots, cannot stand the rude service staff (never - NEVER - encountered rude service staff in Taipei, and it says a lot considering how often I go back there), cannot stand the rude people. I'm generally civil towards people until they piss me off - and it's really very easy to piss me off. I'm sorry, but having been to Taipei, I just cannot accept a lesser standard of civic consciousness and social graciousness. People taking their own sweet time walking up the right side of the escalator during fucking rush hour can just go and die - looking at their retarded phones and slowly dragging their fat asses up the escalator. That fucking woman on Tuesday morning at Raffles Place - oh my god, it all I could do not to push her out of my way. I also get DAMN irritated when people cut my queue while waiting for the MRT in the morning. Why can't you just fucking queue? Would it kill you to get on the next train? And why are you entitled to get on the train more than me when I've been waiting longer than you for the train?

The next time someone pisses me off on the MRT, directly or indirectly, that person's going to get it from me. I really should've scolded that fucking useless piece of shit Singapore Polytechnic guy this morning; after I'm done with him, he'd never dare to sit on a reserved seat ever again. As if I'd be scared of him just because he's male. Come on, after I shouted at that stupid Malay man at Yio Chu Kang the last time (who locked me in the fucking toilet without so much as CHECKING for more than 3 seconds, and still had the audacity to blame me for it - fuck you) who was built like he could crush me with one hand, I can take on anyone.

Just so it's clear that I actually practice what I preach, I gave up my seat to an old man on Bus 67 today. And I was really tired: before that I fell asleep for a few minutes and only woke up because I didn't have a window to lean against.

Once again - if I can do it, I really don't see why other people can't. So all these assholes like Singapore Poly guy can just...get out of this country.

Oh wait...after that, there'd maybe be 1% of the entire population left.

But then again, maybe that's better for this stupid country.

***

First day of classes today and it was okay. The only part I liked was seeing my friends, all together, Rui, Mag, Jean, and I, and Jolie with us over lunch. It was GREAT.

The actual lectures...I was too busy being upset with my parents to pay attention. Oops.

***

Saw Tong two nights in a row. Very happy girl. Seeing him again tomorrow for a very particular reason and it better happen or happy girl will become sad girl. Shall give my post mortem tomorrow, if it happens. Hahahahaha.

He should stop ordering fries though. Fuck, I really wasn't going to eat any, and did really well for about 15, 20 minutes, but after a while I picked up the fork and started eating. DAMMIT. I'm so gonna get fat and it'd be all his fault. (By the way, this was at 10 PM. I have ceased to adhere to my no-food-after-8PM rule. 'Tis a tragedy, a disaster.)

before sunrise // before sunset

Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010