doesn't take much to change
written: 5:50 p.m. on Wednesday, Nov. 20, 2002
So I was very anxious and worried and nerve-wrecked, when all of a sudden Sakuragi landed on the guy with the rod. He jumped over this wall and fell on the guy. Hahahahaha. I couldn't stop laughing. But the point is, Mitsui is such a good person. He promised the coach that he wouldn't fight and he didn't. He even got on his knees in front of those assholes! I can't believe this guy is the same as that long-haired sissy who stormed the basketball court with his gang. He lost his two front teeth in some fight and when he first appeared and smiled, I was like, "Who the fuck is that ugly dude?" Now he's fixed two fakes in the gaps and he's cut his hair, changed who he is and god, now I love him. Sigh.
Well anyway, I had A Maths paper two and it was hard. Chemistry was easy but I didn't study so I didn't know how to do it. I could only do the mole concept questions. Was falling asleep throughout Chemistry. So boring.
Today is Gen's birthday. He's 21. Poor thing still has to work. Called him from the bus interchange to say 'happy birthday' and it was weird. I think it's just me but it was weird.
I'm feeling better today, although I'm immensely pissed off by the fact that I have to limp when I walk because my left leg hurts. I don't know what happened. I felt the strain last night when changing positions but I thought it would just go away. I mean, it's been there since Monday but I didn't think it was serious. Monday was cold and my bones hurt, so I thought that was the reason, but today is hot and I cannot walk properly. I'm annoyed because I like the way I walk. I hate limping around, and if I have to amputate my leg, I can never adjust. I keep seeing amazing people on Ripley's Believe It Or Not who can do physical stuff without all their limbs in place, like this 15-year-old girl from Canada who swam 12 miles across some river, and she is missing both hands and legs. This other woman dances the hula dance on one leg. I can never do that. I'd be too resentful and self-pitying. I could never recover.
Damn ICQ doesn't work on my computer. Try to connect but it keeps getting stuck. I'm still using bloody Windows 95! I didn't even know there were such things as Windows ME and XP until I got a new printer and read that it only works on Windows 98 and higher. Shit. Luckily the printer was kind of free. Mom redeemed it from the petrol station. Yeah.
So exams end next Monday and I don't feel a thing. I expected myself to totally jump for joy, but I can't see myself doing that anymore. Right now it doesn't even feel like I'm having exams. I only have Biology and Science multiple-choice shit left, but way before this, I had already started on my holiday.
Somehow, I just know I'm not going to do very well for the exams. I wanted to get six distinctions but now, I'd be happy to get three. I don't even think I can get an A1 for English anymore, due to the two following facts: 1) Cambridge is stupid and 2) the letter thing. Ah well.
A few of my classmates are going to watch Harry Potter on Friday. Blah. I want to watch the Japanese film I mentioned but I also want to come home and watch Cruel Intentions. I taped it off AXN. But nevermind.
I so don't want to go for graduation anymore. But I've already paid and bought a dumb dress so I guess I don't have a choice. I miss Gen but I don't know what I miss, him or his body?
Fuck, I don't care. There's Slam Dunk tonight. My life is complete.
before sunrise // before sunset
Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010