(david cook +) DAMN FRUSTRATED.
written: 6:55 p.m. on Monday, Apr. 14, 2008

Anyway, the whole point of having lunch there was for my mom to take pictures of some plant/flower thing which she chanced upon a few days ago. The plant/flower is, according to my mom, pretty. And, you know, I suppose it is, but I'm really not a plant/flower sort of person, so I was all, "Yeah, nice", and then, "OMG, SQUIRREL!"

Because OMG, SQUIRREL!

SO ADORABLE!!!!!11!!11!1ONE!!11!ONE! We were hovering around the squirrel and I was trying to take nice pictures of it like a dork and it totally didn't give a shit about us. Like, at all. This squirrel was SO full of attitude, yo.

So, yeah, that was the highlight of my day. Lame, huh?

In the spirit of David Cook for-the-win-ness, I've decided to undertake the impossible task of writing my southern Thailand research paper in less than two days. What has this got to do with Cookie FTWness? Um, nothing. Well, besides the fact that he's in it to win and I'm in it to not get an F for my paper. Or something.

Let's hope I'm not being overly-ambitious, though I probably am, and that I'm not deluding myself, though I probably am. Wish me luck!

The bright side is, I completely re-worked the shit-assed introduction I wrote on Saturday - yes, I took one whole freaking day to write four paragraphs because I was distracted by David and because I JUST DIDN'T FEEL LIKE WRITING - and I had fun re-working it, so that's a good sign. Right? It is. It HAS TO BE. Otherwise, I'm screwed for both ILA and Comp Crim, the latter for which I've done absolutely nothing. LAVAN, RESCUE MEEEEE!!!

I also found a thesis someone did on the same topic in the library. Like, OMG, I went to the library, NO WAY?! The downside is, S!m0n T@y was the student's advisor which...kind of sucks. But it's better than nothing, which was what I originally had until I decided to do a LINC for "self-determination" and found that entry in the library catalogue. Yay me, anyhow.

I'm Facebook friends with Andrew Cook, David's younger brother (half-brother?).

I know, I know. But: HAHAHAHA! This is so fun.

I found out about the existence of ACook's Facebook account around the same time I joined the Vote for DCook on AI Facebook group that I'm always uploading sexy pictures of Cookie in, which was sometime in early March, but I only friended ACook a few days ago. At first I was all, "Dude, no way am I sinking THIS low." Then a few days ago I was all, "I WANT TO SEE ANDREW'S PICTURES OF DAVID DAMMIT!!!!"

So I mustered up the guts to friend him, and I did - just to discover that the pictures he has of David in his Facebook account have already been posted EVERYWHERE on the Internet.

DUH. OF COURSE. For some reason Andrew's Facebook activities don't show up on my news feed, so I had to find out about his latest American Idol pictures from the David Livejournal community I'm in. But they're great photos, so I'm not complaining.

Andrew has also tagged "David Cook" in his David photos. Naturally I clicked on the link, checked out David's friends, and everyone is either from his college or high school. WHICH MEANS IT'S PROBABLY HIS REAL FACEBOOK ACCOUNT. (That, and the fact that his brother - who's totally real, by the way, and not some fan pretending to be his brother - has him on his Facebook friends list.)

The thought of being Facebook friends with David freaks me out, as does the thought of having any sort of communication/contact/whatever with David. As much as I'd totally like to jump him, I can't handle a universe in which he's even remotely aware of the fact that someone named [Yelen] exists (I'm banking on the possibility that he doesn't bother to look at his brother's Facebook account). It's just too freaking weird, and I'd like to admire and drool over him from afar - more specifically, from the other end of the world, thanksverymuch.

(Off-topic: OMG MEL MIGHT BE GOING FOR STEREOPHONICS WITH ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Anyway, I'm too lazy to attempt to justify that, and I'm sure no one cares, so I'll move on to something else, but not before saying this first: I found a link that has high definition American Idol videos for download. I downloaded all the Cookie ones, and I've been watching them over and over before I sleep for the past two nights. Not only was David totally adorable after he was through to the Top 24 when he said, "I don't have to get a job!", having David eye-fuck me in high definition while performing Day Tripper just wins them all. Like, totally.

I just had dinner and the dinner conversation topic was, as usual, my brother's grades/university chances/lack thereof. I'd just like to say this one thing before I get back to my mission of writing my research paper in less than two days:

I'M SO FREAKING FRUSTRATED WITH MY BROTHER OH MY GOD.

He seemingly has no AORTA of competitiveness in him, he seemingly doesn't give a shit about his A Levels, he seemingly seems to believe that the A Levels are cake and that he can coast by and still get good results. HE'S SERIOUSLY DELUDED OH MY GOD. I read his most recent GP test and it was a typical answer written by a Jurong Junior student. In other words? It sucked. His grammar was all wonky, the content was non-existent, and he had absolutely no style. Maybe my standards are set too high, considering the kind of GP essays I used to churn out, but come on, let's be realistic. You're competing against people from Hwa Chong/Raffles/National/etc. A subpar essay isn't going to get you anything better than a D, and pray tell what the fuck can you do with a D for GP? That's assuming you ace all your other subjects - which, granted, is never a guarantee, but as it stands I'm not even sure if it's a probability, let alone a possibility.

My parents kept asking him to get some tuition for Economics and Math, and my brother was all, "I'll ask my friend! He's the top student!"

WHAT THE FUCK. SERIOUSLY. TELL ME I'M NOT ALONE IN THE OUTRAGE, BECAUSE SERIOUSLY, YOU'LL ASK YOUR FREAKING FRIEND? Top student or not, he may just be as clueless as you. I know I was clueless on many things back in JC, because I WASN'T AN EXPERT ON ANY OF MY SUBJECTS, which is to be expected because I WAS ONLY A STUDENT, and STUDENTS ARE NOT TEACHERS EXIST FOR A REASON. I'm completely aghast and flabbergasted that he's setting his sight so freaking low. I might have got him interested in entering law school, I'm not sure, but assuming he wants to enter law school, I don't see how he's gonna remotely stand a chance against the Raffles/Hwa Chong/etc A Level holders if he doesn't do something about his appalling lack of general knowledge, his average-and-not-good-enough standard of English, and basically his frustratingly lackadaisical and deluded attitude towards the whole affair.

One essential and critical reason why I was able to get the A Level results I got was because I absolutely refused to be associated with the general crappiness that is Jurong Junior. (I wish I could find some way to mince my words, but truth is truth, sorry.) Like I told my brother, no one in law school would guess that I wasn't from a top 5 JC - not because law students are arrogant, but because the fact is simply that only a very, very, VERY few number of students from the likes of Jurong Junior can make it to law school. Call it arrogance if you must, call it whatever you want, and I'll readily admit that I wasn't the most humble or pleasant person back in JC. But one good thing that came out of my general unpleasantness and hubris was that it drove me to do whatever it took to prove the Jurong Junior stigma wrong, to set myself apart from the stereotype, to rise above my circumstances. That was something that I felt I had to do, or else; otherwise, I'm not sure I would have been so anxious to ace the A Levels.

I just don't understand at all why my brother doesn't seem to care or feel the same way. Is it because he's never been in a so-called elite school? (Not sure how elite SNGS is, but whatever.) But doesn't it piss him off that our cousin, who's the same age as him and is in a top 5 JC, has been kicking his ass in all these academic things since time immemorial? If I were in his shoes, I'd be pretty pissed and I'd want to prove that I'm at least as good, if not better, than her. I couldn't even handle the possibility that I wasn't as good as students from top 5 JCs back then, let alone a cousin, someone that I have to see a few times a year.

I don't understand how it's possible that I want him to do well more than he wants himself to do well, or so it seems. I DON'T KNOW. Thinking about his A Levels is enough to make my blood boil. Just his GP alone is like...WAH LAU EY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING. I used to read the stupid Straits Times every day a few months before the actual paper and cut out stupid newspaper articles and pasted them in scrap books just to prepare for a bloody retarded paper that I already had a 95% chance of acing. The brother? He failed his last GP test because the content honestly DID NOT FREAKING EXIST (and his teacher didn't even make any comments about his shitty content. I wouldn't be surprised if I was the first person to tell him that his content sucked), and he does not have language on his side. It's not against him, but it's also not 100% in his favour.

WHY ISN'T HE WORRIED? OMG I JUST WANT TO KILL HIM.

Okay, I seriously have to get back to my paper or it'll totally become an Epic Fail, so...yeah, I'm done ranting/gushing (about David)/whatever.

Edit at 10.15 p.m.:

I just spent US$1.99 downloading Don't Stop the Music, which the AI Top 8 performed on Idol Gives Back, just for a high definition version of probably 7 seconds of David shaking his hips and singing "your hands around my waist" or whatever the exact line is. *dies* And I'm really not going to watch the rest of it 'cause I don't care about So You Think You Can Dance and I'm not a fan of the song. Effectively, then, I spent US$1.99 on 7 seconds of David. ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, it's for charity!!11!1one!

Must preserve iTunes funds for future David performances and studio recordings, since he's gonna make it to the Top 2!!!!

Okay I gotta stop saying that just in case I jinx him. It's only Monday and already I'm freaked out about what he's gonna do on Wednesday. Then again, I've been freaked out pretty much since his Innocent performance. I hope he doesn't bomb again, or my iTunes funds would totally go to waste.

On the paper front, I'm stuck at the history-of-Malay-Muslim unrest section. ARGH. I hate writing this.

before sunrise // before sunset

Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010