candle in the wind.
written: 10:29 p.m. on Wednesday, Dec. 29, 2004

Finally got all the essentials for tomorrow's pseudo-prom. The shoe shopping took a lot out of me and it really pissed me off, but in the end, I bought a decent pair of black heels for a whopping grand total of $20.90. I absolutely love it. The price, I mean. And the shoes too, but to a slightly smaller extent.

Seriously, I'm so not bothered about the Jurong Junior prom that I'm not getting my hair done and I'm not even wearing any make-up, except for nailpolish because I love nailpolish. In the first place, I'm an absolute idiot when it comes to cosmetics, and my mom is no whiz either, so I don't think I should ~{;-I_LmWc~}, you know?

(The best way to express the above is to use that Chinese idiom, which roughly translates to spoiling something already quite presentable by adding unnecessary details to it.)

And you know what else? Despite my earlier complaints about how the graduation thingy is going to be held in school, I still have to say that, from the bottom of the heart that supposedly belongs to me, I am very, very glad that it's not at some posh hotel. My reason is less noble than Tingren's and a lot more cynical, but here goes: I don't wish to spend a bomb on the same amount of entertainment that I can get with just $20. We're talking about JJC here. The day that JJC becomes "glam" is the day that the world truly ends. And since there's certainly no love lost between the school and I, I definitely don't wish to pay like $80 for the dumb graduation/pseudo-prom thing. Why? Because I simply don't care. I only bought the ticket because a certain gorgeous person is going to be there, which is regrettable since I don't really like him that way anymore.

But hey, whatever, you know? Here's the list of items I've bought for the pseudo-prom:

Dress - $63.20
Shoes - $20.90
Ticket - $20
Underwear - $26 (but it's unwearable so I'm gonna go get another fucking strapless bra tomorrow; what a pain!)

Did I leave out anything? No, I didn't. I didn't even bother to buy a new handbag shit thing. I'm just gonna use that very functional, multi-purpose blue pouch I got from Holland Village earlier this year.

So, many heartfelt thanks to Jurong Junior for helping me save money. The money I've spent thus far doesn't even remotely measure up to the $189 I wasted on that Sec 4 graduation dress that I never wore again. And since I really, really, really don't give a shit about the people in my school, save for a few good friends and classmates, I can go to sleep with a clear conscience, and tomorrow...will be one hilarious day.

I can't hardly wait.

One and a half

Went to a lot of places to look for shoes today. After I passed Serxon the Formula 17 DVD, I hit these places: Isetan @ Wisma Atria; Takashimaya; Tangs; Isetan @ Shaw; Isetan @ Wisma again; a few random shoe stores; and finally, John Little @ Specialist Centre.

I first saw the pair of shoes that I eventually bought at Isetan @ Wisma; but the thing is, they didn't have black in Size 8, which is the minimum size for me, and they only had white. I was so desperate at one point of time that I almost threw in the towel and bought the white, but luckily I was smart enough to call my mom and asked her about it and she convinced me that it would look damn horrid with a black dress.

Thank you, Mom. You totally rule the world.

The problem with shoes and me is that I can't walk in heels that are too high, and nowadays, shoes come in heels that are too high. That, or they're blatantly made of genuine leather, which I'm fervently against and will always be. Sad to say though, I was so irritated and tired and pissed off that I asked to try on that Everbest shoes I saw at Robinsons on that day, the genuine leather one, but FORTUNATELY, they didn't have my size. The old man was like, "You need a size 8. Size 6/7 (whatever) is too small for you."

Yes, I know. My big feet is the price I pay for being as tall as I am, and you know what? I completely take pride in it, thank you very much.

But anyway, thank goodness for my sanity and health (I coughed the day away and felt damn feverish while I was sleeping), I found the same pair of shoes I saw at Wisma at John Little. Tried them on, could walk in them without looking like the Incredible Hulk with yellow skin and black long hair, thought they looked pretty good, and presto! I went to the cashier and made my purchase.

And, yes, the very agreeable and lovely price made the purchase the more sweet. In the end, I had $80 to return to my mom. That's really good, I know.

Too bad, though, that I have to buy another fucking bra. Great. Pierre Cardin or whatever has really nice designs but the quality is so shoddy. I don't know how to describe the thing that's wrong with the bra I bought today...something like, you know, the wire thing at the sides are kinda jutting out and you can see them jutting out when I wear the dress.

Like, how ghastly. Hitting West Mall tomorrow morning, by hook or by crook.

Two

December 26, 2004, 9 AM. 2 PM. December 25 in the States and surrounded regions.

To me, it's proof that there is no god, but my atheist inclinations aren't really relevant to the issue at hand.

I haven't been reading the papers; I've grown very tired of it after the exams. I didn't want to know, but there's no escape anyway. Dad watches the Taiwanese news all the time, and he tells me stuff. My mom reads the papers and tells me stuff too.

Death toll in figures of five. I think I'm already numbed. I don't feel anything but a nasty catch in my throat, but the point is, to whom do we push the blame when something this mammoth happens? There's no Osama bin Laden to focus our hatred on, no Al-Qaeda to help us make sense of such brutal wantonness, no terrorist blood to shed to avenge the ones that have already lost the ability to bleed.

'Tragedy' barely sums it up. I don't know what does, either. Maybe even words are too trivial, hardly enough, in the face of...this. That. Something that happened so far away, and yet, it's eerily close to home; Southeast Asia.

I don't even know what to say. I thought of ranting about the inherent stupidity of human beings, how nobody thinks of precautions until it's too damn late; how is the seismic (sp) centre in Japan going to revive the ones that have already died?

But, too much white noise, I think. You don't need to hear it from me. There's no point in even writing about this, really; it's not going to change anything.

But, in a larger sense, we're going to come out of this a lot more scarred than we did post-911. It's always more difficult when you know that there isn't anyone to blame.

this entry requires chinese simplified encoding

before sunrise // before sunset

Previously:
- - Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2017
I'm moving. - Sunday, Jul. 11, 2010
In all honesty - Tuesday, Jul. 06, 2010
What I want for my birthday... - Sunday, Jul. 04, 2010
On Roger's behalf. - Friday, Jul. 02, 2010